Discouragement, Hope, Mothering, Trusting God

Hope: When We’re in the Battle

@JeanneTakenaka +Jeanne Takenaka

I was going through a hard season with one of our boys. Fights, angry words, hatred in the eyes because of every word I spoke. I was the loser-mom in his eyes. 

His hard heart about broke mine. 

The back talk, the disrespect, the hate-laced words gouged holes my spirit until it felt as pocked as the moon.

This wasn’t a day’s worth of struggle. This was weeks. The constant ripping apart within me left me depleted and weary. 


No parent ever gets out of this journey without scars. We all bear them. Eventually, they may cover over with new skin. The hurt will decrease. 

But in those first days of the ripping apart? The wide-open wound stings with every breath, every word spoken.

Each of us faces battles. Whether it’s with rebellious children. Discouragement. A lost job and not finding a new one. Sickness. 

We’re all facing something.

The thing is? We can’t just opt out. We have to fight through. 

And the battle wears us down. Sometimes, our understanding of God grows distorted. 

We come to the place where we can’t see beyond our immediate circumstances. 

Everything presses hard upon us, squeezing out our life-breath. 

Our hope.

When we’ve fought and battled and poured out the essence of who we are? 

When we feel we have nothing left? 

Like we’ve lost everything? 

When hope seems to have fled? 

That is when we must remember that we are never hope-less. Because we know the One who is the Hope-Giver.

Sometimes the battle feels unwinnable. 

Sometimes, winning comes in the breathing the next breath . . . 

In the clinging to the Lord . . . 

Even when circumstances don’t seem to change.

It’s in the times when we feel hopeless—when maybe we even question if Jesus is with us—that we most need to turn to Him.

He’s with us, regardless of whether or not we feel Him. 

God. is. with. us.

When the battle wears us out. Breaks us down . . . It’s in these times when we must look beyond the darkness. To the One who is the Creator of light.
He sees us. 

He cares for us. 

He declares His love over us.

He is our safe place, the One in whom we can place our hope.

Our emotions may call this out as a lie. But, our emotions lie. 

Our hearts must choose Jesus over discouragement. Over despair. Over defeat.

When we’re in the throes of a battle—physical, emotional, spiritual, mental—we must remember this: We are not alone.

Our Lord is with us. He strengthens us. He speaks love over us. 

When it seems He is silent, we must trust what we know, rather than what we feel. He has promised to never leave or forsake us. He is quiet in His love. 

When the battle bores down hard on all of who we are, we need to cling to His truth, not give in to the lies. 

This will defeat us.

Battles have a beginning point. And they have an end.

And when we reach the other side of that battle, we will know God more intimately. We will not be shaken as easily the next time.

We will shine more brightly, for Jesus’ light prevailed within us.

As for my boy? I poured out my heart to the Lord about him, about the situations. I confessed my hurt and my confusion. My ineptitude as a mom.

My boy came through that season. His heart—his teenage solar flare calmed—and his joy returned.

And He, my faithful, perfect Father, spoke the words I needed to hear to persevere. He knows how to strengthen each of us in the battle. We just need to bring our hearts to Him.

What about you? What lessons have you learned in battle? How do you persevere when the hard seasons seem never-ending?

Click to Tweet: We must remember that we are never hope-less. 

I’m linking up with #RaRaLinkup, #TellHisStory, and Holley Gerth


20 thoughts on “Hope: When We’re in the Battle”

  1. When hopes slips away as the bloody dawn
    brings naught but pain and dread,
    and it feels like faith is the cruelest con
    game, and soon you will be dead,
    just remember the Book and not the lawn
    of prosperity churches, and the well-bred
    words that would seek favour by fawn
    and flattery of a God they presume to have led
    to admiration of their Jabez-quoted run…
    but they forget they’ve a God (this is NO FUN)
    who cooly let die His Own Son.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Andrew, so much truth in your words. We need to remember that God’s words are faithful and true, and not prone to change. And, yes, He is sovereign and not controlled by man’s wishes or whims. And, because of His love, He did let His own Son die on our behalf. Which always humbles me deeply. And, because of this, we have hope in His love for us.

      Praying for you, friend.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. OH, the “teenage solar flare.”
    I think I still have a touch of PTSD from our season of conflict, and am thankful that (for the moment) things are quiet and peaceful here on the homefront.
    I come back to Zeph. 3:17 myself very often, because I, too, find myself in need of grace and the reminder that even though I fall flat on my face in so many areas of life, on my face is not such a bad place to be when God is there with me.
    Blessings to you in this parenting journey, Jeanne.


    1. I’m glad things are quiet in your world at the moment, Michele. Yes and amen about the need for grace. 🙂 I’m so thankful for God’s grace and mercy and His quiet love toward us. I so appreciate your words, friend.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Oh Jeanne … it’s so wonderful when the joy returns to the hearts of our loved ones, isn’t it? It gives me hope that when it goes away again (as it seems prone to do during this season of parenting), it won’t stay gone forever. I found myself nodding along at every sentence, my friend. I’m so thankful that God brought you and your son through this trying season …


  4. Dear Jeanne!

    Thank you for sharing your thought here on the concept of hope. Sometimes we experience those times as mums; I only have one son, but that’s also a huge responsibility.

    I agree with you; no parent gets out of this journey without scars. But we have to stay tuned and stay on track. I love your perspective here; we are never hope-less.

    I’m glad that your boy came through that season.

    One of the best tricks I use, apart from seeking the Lord, is walking in nature. No matter what problem I have faced, it has always helped with a long walk 🙂

    Edna Davidsen


  5. Thank you for your encouraging words, Jeanne! It is so important to hold onto hope and to the truth of God’s promises even when circumstances would cause us to doubt. Knowing God is with us in the battle makes such a difference. I’m glad you saw him working in the situation with your son.


  6. Yes, the Hope-giver! It can be so easy to forget that sometimes. Thankful and blessed to be your neighbor at Tell His Story this week friend!


  7. I have been in the battle and not only with teenage sons even though somehow I did survive that. I’ll be honest I was newer in my new found faith when my sons were teenagers so I didn’t have all the tools I needed to make a successful run through the angst. Like I said, God graciously brought me through to the other side and my relationship now with my sons is very God-ceneterd. I am rejoicing with you that the “teenage color flare” has calmed down. The thing that carries me through the battles now is knowing that God is always with me.


    1. Mary, one of the things that brings great hope on this mothering journey is the reality that He fills in our gaps as parents. He knows how to do a new work where we totally mess up with our kids. I am beyond thankful for this. And I agree with you…knowing God carries me through the battles is a great comfort. Thanks for sharing your words here, friend!


    1. It’s true, isn’t it Meghan? When we’re in the thick of it with our kids, it’s hard to see beyond that. I don’t know about you, but sometimes I get sucked up into the emotions and end up depleted. I’m thankful God is always with us through those times, and that He gives us all that we need to walk through it. And He’s teaching us as moms, just as He’s working in the hearts of our children. Thanks so much for visiting, friend!


  8. I remember well those feelings that it’s going to last forever, this tension and frustration with raising my kids (particularly my eldest) and a wise woman said, ‘you will get through it.’ I didn’t have the faith life I have now, and can see how clinging to God through those times is what brings up the Hope you mention! And that way we are more graceful and loving on ourselves during that time, which He sure wants for us!


    1. SUCH good words here, Shirlee. I get too easily entangled in the argument. I’m learning how to step aside, even when one of the boys seeks to draw me in. Thank you for this.


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