(This is part three of a three part series. In part one, I explored the idea of When Good Enough Isn’t and compromise). In part two, I shared thoughts on when Good Enough is Good Enough. I look forward to hearing your thoughts!)
When I met my husband, I was teaching third grade, serving in the nursery at church, serving in the high school ministry, leading worship at a start-up church, attending a home fellowship and sometimes helping with worship there. I was a busy lady.
As our relationship grew, we spent more time together. One by one, God encouraged me to set aside these other ministries. He was preparing me for the ministry of marriage. Was it easy to step back from all these ministries? No! I loved being a part of every single one of them.
I had to choose. Was my relationship with my then-boyfriend more important, or was it more important to be serving in the various ministries I’d been a part of? Choosing to set aside good-enough for God’s best isn’t always easy.
God’s best looks different for each person because of season of life, family needs, and life issues. Figuring out how much time is healthy for us to spend on fulfilling the callings God gives us usually comes through making mistakes.
When I place writing as a higher priority than time spent with my husband and boys, I begin to feel stressed out. The boys act out, and my hubby sometimes begins to withdraw. And then we have . . . The Talk.
The one where he has to find a way to gently tell me my priorities are out of whack. It’s always a hard conversation, but I’ve needed it a few times. He cares enough about our relationship to confront me when I need to re-align my priorities.
As I’ve learned to walk in the calling to write, I’ve had to give up other things. I’ve struggled with feeling guilty for stepping back from good things, like leading women’s bible studies.
I’ve learned to say no to good activities so I can say yes to God’s best—which, for me, includes family and writing, in particular. I believe this is His calling for me for a few reasons.
- As I spent time with Him, He impressed it on my heart.
- He’s given me a passion for writing.
- I find great joy in doing this.
- He’s helping me to become better at it, and showing me that He’s using my words in the lives of people.
Knowing God’s calling has come through much prayer and talking with those who care about me. He confirmed this calling in unmistakeable ways.
Determining God’s best for your life begins with spending time with Him. We need to talk with Him honestly about what His priorities are for us, and embrace them. Lots of activities will come along. We must determine if they line up with what God’s shown us. When we know our primary priorities, it’s easier to say no to the good things so we can say yes to the best things.
What if God shows us a priority He has for us that we don’t want? That’s hard. We tend to rationalize why we shouldn’t have to do it. When we don’t understand why He’s asking something of us, we have a choice: to trust Him or to trust ourselves. It’s a struggle sometimes!
To not yield to His plan is to deny the best that He has for us. It requires a daily walking out this trust. It’s rarely easy to do the hard things, but it’s always worthwhile.
Right now, my main focus of ministry is writing. If I’m asked to lead a women’s Bible study group, I pray about it. I ask God to direct me, and He usually does. When I’m not sure, I ask my husband. It’s helpful to have someone to talk with who sees the question with a different perspective.
It can be a struggle to follow God’s plans. When He asks me to follow His best rather than what I want to do, sometimes it hurts. It requires me to trust Him, rather than myself. To say yes to His unknown plan and no to what I want.
God honors our obedience. He blesses our decisions. Do I always know God’s best? No. I pray and sometimes, I make a mistake. But, God is gracious and works through my mistakes. I don’t think I’ll ever be 100% perfect at saying yes to God’s best, but as I grow in trusting Him, I think I’ll say yes to the right things more often
What about you? What are your thoughts about good-enough and God best? What would you add for discovering God’s best for you?